Shedding Some Light

This Ad’s All Wet
My wife, Louise, and I were sitting in our living room. She was watching TV, and I was paying little attention to anything when she suddenly said, “Would you like a water mattress?”

I asked, “Why would you ask such a silly question as that?” She replied, “Well, that furniture company just advertised that they were going to liquidate all of their mattresses, and I thought you might like to have one of them.”

Andrew Stenson
Johnson Creek, Wis.

Single, Adult Lutheran Seeking
Several years ago, the Lutheran churches in our area decided to form a group for single adults. The group was named SALT: Single Adult Lutherans Together. But one Sunday morning when our pastor was making announce- ments, he had trouble remembering what those initials stood for. “All the singles in our congregation are invited to join the SALT Group,” he explained. “SALT stands for . . . um, Single Adults Living Together.” Oops.

Carolyn Bolz
Riverside, Calif.

It Pays to Ask
A man was praying to God. “God?” he asked. “Go right ahead,” God answered.

“What is a million years to you?” the man asked. “A million years to me is only a second,” replied God.

“Hmm,” the man wondered. Then he asked, “What is a million dollars to you?” God said, “A million dollars to me is a penny.”

The man then asked, “May I have a penny?” “Sure,” God replied, “in just a second.”

George Kottwitz
Edwardsville, Ill.

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